Dreams

Lately, I keep having these dreams that I have money… that kind of money where you don't have to worry about paying for things… and I don't work at all, because I don't have to, instead I do all kinds of short term missions trips. Like 2 weeks here, 3 months there… kind of just following whatever path that I feel led on.

I'm not saying this is something I feel God is telling me to do, because I don't feel that it is. I've never felt the call to be a missionary other then on the mission field that is the city I live in/my place of employment/my neighborhood. And trust me; God is really speaking to me, lately, on the fact that I am a witness for Him no matter where I am, and that I need to be bold for Him no matter who I am around. Not an easy thing for me. I mean, I know I'm kind of loud and outspoken, but somehow I become timid when it comes to my faith. (I'm trying to remember 2 Timothy 1:7)

But at the same time, wouldn't my dreams becoming reality be cool? To have the money to afford to, in a sense, become a wanderer for Christ? To be able to buy your own health insurance and not have to have a job so that when you felt the Lord calling you to go somewhere for Him, you just could? And while you were home you'd be able to serve in other capacities, or let's be honest, hang with family and friends… But ultimately, you had nothing to leave behind that you had to be doing (i.e. JOBS!), and you didn't have to ask people for any kind of support other than prayer support...

To be honest, there are a lot of things I would rather do then work at a bank (*sshhhh* don't tell my boss!). I did a whole blog previously on what I would do if I ever won the lottery… which I don't play… and some of it was selfish, but some of it wasn't. I sometimes think that I have a wandering spirit, the desire to see new places and meet new people. To be able to travel the world on a whim and desire to see as much as I can; to meet all kinds of people and experience different cultures. Unfortunately I'm in debt, have to work a job to pay it off (I'm getting there), pay my rent, utilities; put gas in my car, etc…

I guess that, at least for a while, I'll have to live within my dreams…